There is something to be said about ‘feeling bad’ – sometimes feeling ‘bad’ is really a very good thing – it’s called EMPATHY!
I am amazed at the number of people who work so hard at not feeling ‘bad’… they blame everyone else for their problems and misery, they avoid facing the necessary consequences for their poor actions or decisions, and they make other people bend to their wishes – all so they don’t feel bad about themselves.
This problem starts in childhood. Every watch those parents who at all cost want to make sure their precious little tikes don’t feel bad? They give in to their tantrums in the store, they shower them with candy and treats, they fix all their messes and jump through hoops to keep their kids happy. Unfortunately, those kids grow up and get married, and suddenly their spouse is the ‘parent’ who is supposed to make them feel good!
WOW – what a disaster that is!
Paul says that when he was a child he acted like a child, but when he grew up he put away childish things. Maybe you are grown and married and have never faced yourself in the mirror. Well, it’s about time you do. You are a sinner married to a sinner. You are not perfect, but you can be ‘made perfect’ through the healing and redemptive and delivering Power of Jesus Christ and The Holy Spirit. Yeah, an honest look at yourself in the mirror may hurt – That’s OK! It’s where you have to start if you want to grow into the husband or wife God has designed you to be – and it will actually ‘feel good’ for REAL when you make the necessary changes. It won’t be that phony ‘feel good’ you have been living on your whole life – it will be a feel good for real that will blow you away.
So take the first steps – look in the mirror – take inventory – and find a trusted mentor (of the same sex, and who is already walking in victory) to give you truth, counsel, love, and support.